Hey – Walker and Davis here.
Happy Saturday morning to the Laying Foundations community!
Understanding trade partners is arguably the most important thing I do daily. If I neglect those relationships, there will always be more challenges than successes.
Today’s issue takes about 6 minutes to read and was written for you by Davis Hambrick.
Enjoy.
Quote Of The Week
“If we think negatively of ourselves, we will seek validation from others—extracting value from them. On the contrary, if we have a positive view of ourselves, we will be secure enough to add value to the people around us.”
– John Maxwell
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It is easy and lazy to yell at someone in the construction industry.
If you walk on a job site in today’s climate of projects, you will see many people overworked, exhausted, and depleted. It is really easy to walk by a tradesperson and not ask about their day.
I say that because I used to be that guy. I didn’t understand the big picture of how all trades come together to make the building. I only wanted to know about my scope of work and point fingers at other trades when their work was deficient and didn’t allow me to complete it.
Believe it or not, it took someone who wasn’t in construction to invest in me and my career and how I should strive to want to understand instead of point fingers.
So the big question is, how do we understand our trade partners?
Step #1 – Listen More Than You Talk
I am sure people who follow us are tired of hearing it, but you can truly learn if you have the guts to be quiet and listen to the people and interactions around you. Yes, God gave us two ears and one mouth for a reason, but I am going deeper than that phrase. I believe that listening more than you talk also helps the other person become a better version of themself.
Why?
When you actively listen, you give the power over to the other person and take their opinion. Whether you end up agreeing with them or not isn’t the point. You took enough time to STOP in the middle of your day, blocked out all other distractions, and showed the person in front of you that you care about what they have to say.
Trust me when I say this – you will get more people on job sites to do things for you just by listening and showing others you value their point of view.
But how does listening help the other person become a better version of themself?
You never know what your trade partner or co-worker is going through. We are quick to judge, point fingers, and label others soft. In reality, it takes more courage for a person to show up to work broken and be completely honest & vulnerable in themself. Listening helps the other person become a better version of themself because, for the first time in their career, someone has shown they matter.
Step #2 – Ask Questions
I ask questions because I am not that smart; I leverage other people’s knowledge constantly to learn and grow. I want the other person to feel valued; if they are the expert in their craft, why not ask?
Suppose you are a mechanical tradesman and struggle to understand why you always conflict with the fire protection trade. Instead of criticizing them, ask them why they decided to run their sprinkler pipe in the path of your ductwork.
You may learn that the sprinkler crew can’t 90 down to miss your ductwork, run the sprinkler pipe down the corridor, and 90 back up because there isn’t a pump on this system, so this portion of pipe will hold too much water, and the code doesn’t allow for that.
You can learn a lot just by asking questions. I guarantee you all people will appreciate you asking before jumping to conclusions.
Step #3 – Give Feedback
After learning to listen more than you talk and ask questions, it is time to give feedback. Everyone knows the general rule of thumb that we must give positive feedback 3 times for every 1 negative feedback comment.
But do we honestly do that?
I know I don’t; I probably land in the 1:1 ratio camp.
Regardless, we should strive to praise people more than we critique. 9principles.com says that feedback is emotional and that we are all emotionally invested in our work. When we are negatively critiqued, our brain releases higher cortisol levels, responding in a fight-or-flight manner.
Have you ever felt an adrenaline rush when someone is critiquing you?
I know I have; it takes everything in you not to want to turn around and let them have it altogether. And if this is the typical response to being critiqued, imagine how our bodies feel when it is a constant critique battle every day.
On the flip side, when we are praised, our brain releases oxytocin, making us feel happy and secure.
Don’t you think it is easier and more conducive to work together when someone praises you more than critiques you? I sure believe so.
Quality of the Week: Perceptive – having or showing sensitive insight
20-Year-Old Self Advice: Listen to understand, not respond
In the summer of 2019, I worked for a general contractor based out of Nashville, TN who specialized in multi-family construction. I was working at the home office in the project management intern track and quickly realized after two long weeks that I needed to be in field management.
I learned a lot about myself that summer through trial and error.
I wasn’t investing in leadership development like I do now and I certainly didn’t understand other people. I was a college intern that thought I knew everything about construction because I had a few semesters of school under my belt.
Needless to say, I began to get humbled very quickly.
I remember times of telling people what to do and not having a clue about their trade. I remember telling people to get out of the way because I worked for the general contractor, and you work for me. I remember working 60 hours a week and was flat exhausted.
I believe for too many of us in the construction industry start our careers out on the above 3 sentences. The majority of management “leads” that way because that is how they were taught so they are going to “teach” the people under them the same exact way.
What if, from the very beginning of our construction career, we learned how to lead differently?
What if, we took time to understand other people, invested in leadership development, and were mentored by people who truly cared?
I believe the construction industry would change in droves if we took the time to learn about someone else and stop thinking about ourselves.
Use this model:
- Listen more than you talk
- Ask Questions
- Give Feedback (praise others more than you critique)
And see what happens next.
Check out episode 104 on The Laying Foundations Podcast!
Join us for our conversation with the co-founder of Jet.Build, Adam Stark. Adam started his career in the Israeli Airborne Special Forces and became VP of the Construction & Redevelopment firm in New York. After working through the ownership side of construction for years, Adam and his business partner Joseph began to build an app from scratch to help streamline data where all party stakeholders use the same software.
